Smash Bang Crash


See you May 2015 in Gloucester County, New Brunswick, Canada






Grannies making … Errrrr … Grannies think they can learn to make music.

Why not!

Grannies have this idea that music is a human rights issue … That every Granny should have the right to make music. They don’t think that music is only for the young.

Where on earth did they get such an idea? Just imagine! Music as an expression of Human Rights.

Where in the world do you see any self-respecting Grannies trying to learn to make music!

What next? Before you know it the Grannies will be demanding Rock Concerts in Ol’ Folks Homes.

Who would ever dream of encouraging such foolishness?

What Musical Grannies? Nonsense! Who ever heard of Grannies being musical.

Surely they are capable of learning a few simple tunes …
Baa baa Black Sheep … Three Blind Mice … Lone Ranger theme even … But what about lyrics … Do those Ol’ Grannies even have anything worthwhile to sing about … Do any of them even care much about anything but their visits to Specialists?

Do you ever hear them talking about such important things as world economy and land development and business strategy?

What do the Grannies busy themselves with?

Oh! Really? You don’t say! And this is a Global Issue?

And do Grannies speak out on local issues too?

What do you mean they are afraid of suffering discrimination?

How can there possibly be discrimination in Canada, especially in the only bilingual province? No No! That cannot possibly happen in New Brunswick

There are so many things to write about … To sing songs about … Take for example … Life lived outside the box as some Grannies manage to do … Or for the dear souls who are beyond the Pale … Well there is always life as lived in the the Nursing Home

Do you suppose … If they had a hero come in and play the harp for them … Would it ease the pain? How about asking Brian Boru?

Fund-raising for the Rock Opera? You want to discuss that? Now?
But what does this have to do with misappropriating funds from Little old Grannies’ Trust Funds. Surely there is elsewhere to look for much-needed funding … Maybe some enterprise that is ” in the chips” as they used to say … Well some movie no doubt.
No I guess I have no idea if these are Chips are stolen. The information on the chips? Hmmmm …

Do you suppose … Wonder if J.Depp is still busy … Might he consider this as an official proposal? Payment? How about a percentage of the proceeds? Does he do Equity ?

OK … Agreed … No politics … Absolutely. We’ll wipe that thought out.


Tedious financial and legal matters? Let the lawyers and accountants look after that stuff.

Management? Yechhhh!

So … This is what you do … Yes You. You string up your harp … Well OK guitar if you prefer … Then thou go down to your nearest Ol’ Folks Home and sign up. NO no no … I said sign up not sign in. There is a difference. You sign up as a volunteer. Residents sign in. Why must you sign up? Well part of the rules otherwise you will not be permitted to become a volunteer. Come to think of it … They might not even want you.

If you are accepted as a volunteer then the first thing you do is you sign a disclosure agreement. That’s when you take a solemn vow not to disclose to anyone outside the facility any of the goings-on you notice happening while you volunteer there.

Rules? You want rules? You want to follow the Grannyway do you?
Well there is what we might call a 7 Step Program


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