NewsNose

Here in Canada? How does it go? Something about No news is good news? Does that make sense.

Considering how the news is being filtered … Big Brosister you mean? Hmmmmmm 

What is a poor old Granny to do?

 

So George, what do you think?  

 

Quality Control … I think quality control might be worth looking at George. All the old Grannies of the world … after having lived so long and seen so much … Well surely grannies must have some idea about quality. How about a world-wide grannie consultation on quality control?

And since quality control begins with education. Well, yes, George. If there is no quality control in education, how do we teach future generations to distinguish between real medicine and snake oil. Grannies need to wake up and realize that one day soon …

… Hmmm you know George …

I’m sure you know about the population getting older … And one of these days all these grannies will find themselves at the mercy of the younger generation … Well all I’m saying, George is that the grannies need to realize this and speak up before it is too late. Otherwise, George, the grannies might just find themselves being force-fed snake oil in their final days.

So, where do grannies begin? Glad you asked, George. Ever heard of GIQAC?

How about ORBICOM?
Which is? Oh ohhhhhh … Was is it?< Any Grannies there? Did any Grannies get invited?
Hmmmm chosen by lot? You think?

Just imagine … Nowadays … Canada is one big box George … Sort of … Ever see a real ballot box George? Not like they used to be. One time ballot boxes were made of metal.
You don’t get it do you George?

Type used to be produced with metal too. Took a little more time, more effort. A ticking clock meant there was time to think things over. Not all news all the time was about a ticking clock.

What about news outside of Canada? What about it?

Good Old Days

The Good Old Days?

Do you really belive in that George?  Hmmmm well in the late part of the last century … Was that before The New World Order George? No, I cannot recall exactly.  Well before the year 2000 … Actually before 1999 … Ahhh now that was an interesting year.  Yes George there was. Canada in 1999.  Who was in charge? No idea George.  Sounds too much like politics.

Talk politics? No George absolutely not.  What do I know?  Not much … But here you go …

http://strategis.gc.ca/scdt/invest/dfait/60020-e.htm

Decor Nanny

Yes George. You did hear right. I have become a Decor Nanny … Or if you prefer Decor-Nanny. So.
So? That is the latest and greatest expression George. Must be a sign of intelligence I guess. Well I hear it all the time when I listen to CBC radio.

So, what I do as a Decor-Nanny is … I go to your place with my Decor-Maid kit and I help get your creative juices flowing.
You don’t get it do you George?
It’s about art George. And really you mustn’t feel bad. Most people don’t get art. That’s why artists would much rather associate with other artists.
What is an artist? Good question George. ACK.

The Golden Award

Porridge
Well George … Does everything have a day?
Even porridge?

Seems so … October 10 th 
http://www.worldporridgeday.com/
I must remember that for next year George

I might  even have a chance to win a golden spurtle award … To tell the truth George I had not previously heard of the golden spurtle either.

Sounds even better than the golden toilet-brush award I won a few years ago.  Spoiled me.  Ever since … Well I am not nearly so excited about cleaning toilets anymore.

Spurtle-operator … Sounds almost impressive … What if I were to spread the word that I have recently become a spurtle operator? And if I were to win the spurtle award? Would I receive cards of congratulations do you suppose … Things like “so excited  for you … You must be so proud of your attainement … You see how things get better if you learn to keep your mouth shut … Didn’t I tell you things would pick up if you tried to be a bit more positive?”

Something like that … Do you suppose George? Or would it be the usual polite blank stare of utter boredom.  Would comments on this new occupation be ignored outright because nobody really honestly gives a tinker’s darn what you are doing these days.

That is … Unless it is a professional international fund-raiser where you get to wear the same t-shirt as everyone else and everybody has so much fun walking or running together to raise money to send to the charity of the day.
I say professional because such charity-events are very professional and well-planned even though they may take advantage of an army of unpaid volunteers. But guess what George? Somewhere in the charitable organizations there are often people being paid large salaries. Then there are the free trips.  These days George it is the professional charities that bring in the real money, especially if you can score a couple of lucrative board positions.

You want me to name them, give you particulars about which charities … You want documented proof? Not a report George! You don’t expect a report! Without paying me? Surely you do not expect me to work for nothing?  Hmmm no George … No board either … sorry George … Not available … I’ll be too busy operating my new spurtle promotion enterprise.

Black Friday

Is it really true George?
 … What they say about Black Friday … For instance … Everything I do from now until … Until when George? … That is the part I don’t get …
Anyway it seems that the results of my labours … My endeavours … My hard work … It is mine! All mine! I needn’t pay any taxes from now until whenever. Is that it?

Well George, I really don’t understand the whole concept.

Thick? No George. I simply don’t see how it can possibly make any difference to me. Here I am an elder artist and writer … One whose art and writings have no monetary value … Well if they did then I’d be making a living … Wouldn’t I George?  … As I was saying …

Can we get back to this George? I am busy at the moment … Trying to determine how I am going to spend my salary this month … Well I think you call it salary … Although to tell the truth George I am not sure … Is under $150 a week enough to consider a salary. Well George what I am talking about is my Elder Security check George.  

Well … Not exactly … No George I don’t know what it is called officially these days … Used to be called the Old Age Pension … Or am I getting that wrong … Well yes George I am happy to receive the check every month.  It is an affirmation that I did my time and now am able to lay back and enjoy the fruits of my labours.

Labour? Do you think George that being a housewife is not labour? 

Well yes … Labour of love … That too … 

I’m thinking about a vacuum this month George.  Well no not that one … It would take months of pension checks to pay for George. Yes George … I agree with you that I should be supporting by local business community by buying the more expensive vacuum cleaner from the local small business owner.  But look at it from the perspective of my not having any money to spend on anything else for the next several months.  

And don’t forget George! Christmas is less than a month away.  Well it is after all the short period of time that holds small local business together.  If they can make enough money  at Christmas then they are able to pay the banks the interest due on the money they have to borrow in order to stay in business for the rest of the years. 

The whole thing is a mystery to me too George.  I guess it is something best left to Economists and Accountants … Oh yes Bankers too … And yes George … Insurance Agents.

So you see George although I don’t really get this Black Friday thing and cannot really tender intelligent comments on the pros and cons of the financial world … There is one thing you must know for sure George.
I  am happy to report that I receive money  from the Canadian Government.  Yes George … Every month.

That little check might seem insignificant to you but it is mine and a lot more than I received during the years of being a stay-at-home mom when the family allowance didn’t cover the cost of … Well George let’s not talk about that right now.

Let’s just say I am appreciative. Yes … The check … That lovely little 500 $ plus a few dollars and a few cents  … Every month George … 

Yes … That lovely little greyish-brownish envelope … Is that what is meant  by a plain brown envelope George … With the  return address Matane Quebec, G4W 4N5

I love my little check from the Government of Canada.